Degraded, legitimately

Once Boyfriend and I went to a seminar on sleep, and the speaker told us that the first 20 minutes after you wake up, you are legitimately degraded. Cognitively and physically impaired. That makes total sense to me. I think I'm legitimately degraded the entire morning spanning from 6-10am. My wake-up routine with BF goes something like this:

He wakes up at the crack of dawn, if not before. He tells me he's going to get up, and asks me if I want to keep sleeping. It's a rhetorical question really - he doesn't expect much of an answer, but for some reason he always asks. Then he comes back a little while later, and climbs into bed next to me. He gently and methodically rubs my back and says soothingly "Do you think you're ready to wake up now?" I usually shrug his hand away, mutter/growl something akin to the sound an animal makes when you encroach on its territory, roll over and go back to sleep. He comes back about half an hour later, and this time doesn't lay a hand on me. "Do you want to get up yet, honey?" he asks, still patient and calm. At this point I'm usually on my way towards waking up, so I'm alert enough to start the first round of the Five More Minutes game. Which is really good fun. BF comes in about six times, and each time I ask for five more minutes. He loves this game. We play it for hours sometimes. After my condoned five minutes are all used up, BF begins his final attack, and this time he comes in with reinforcements. Orange juice with grenadine added to make it look like a sunrise - a bribe: I can only have it if I sit up in bed and open both my eyes. He's a real stickler for the eyes thing. Smart man.

I've told BF that I'd wake up on the first try for Starbucks, but he doesn't want to reward me too much for acting out the equivalent of the dead dog maneuver for most of the morning.

 

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