Eyes wide shut

My need to nap right now is overwhelming. 
Today I called the daycare woman who is coming so so so highly recommended by my therapist. She couldn't talk at that moment, because she was TAKING CARE OF THE KIDS!  Do you know how long I've waited to call an in-home daycare provider and hear that they are unable to drum up new business at the moment because they are caring for their charges?
Music.  To.  My.  Ears.


Now THAT'S therapeutic!

My therapist has offered to share her daycare provider with me.  If I were to - in the end - choose to go with this caregiver for our daughter, it will mean my therapist can no longer see me for counseling because of the conflict presented by running into me daily at morning drop-off and afternoon pick-up.  But she adores her caregiver and both her kids have been with this woman for years and she trusts her implicitly.  She knows how important finding good daycare is, and apparently she doesn't think I need the therapy that badly.  Which, to be honest, at this point in my life I don't - it's a nice support, but not necessary.  She sees my desperation for finding good care for our baby, and I think she believes the benefits of having that situation resolved will outweigh the negatives of me being booted from her client list.  She told me to think about.  I'm planning to call her tomorrow to obtain this baby whisperer's digits.


A post in which I whine about being too busy. I know, it's getting old.

I thought this weekend was going to be bad, and turns out I was right on the money.

Friday night Hubs and I both crashed from having not had a single weeknight that wasn't full to the brim until about 9-10pm.  It was nonstop all week, with not a moment of down time.  Then Saturday we'd agreed to watch my friend C's kids overnight while they went to a bed and breakfast in town. They desperately needed the break, but sadly so did we.  It was a long day and night.  We woke up Sunday to a race against the clock to get us both ready for church, home to let the dog out, and keep the kids fed and entertained until C and B returned. 

The end result?  5 minutes late to church (not bad at all given the circumstances), several kid meltdowns, several adult anxiety attacks, and a $145 speeding ticket.

Yup, right on the money with the total suckage that this weekend turned out to be.

Sunday we were at various events and services all day and then finally made it home by about 5pm.  We took Hero for a walk and then spent the rest of the night in our pjs watching 24.  This morning, up and at 'em with an early OB appointment, a bunch of errands, a dog walk, and now I'm headed to the office.

This week's another hellish one.  I honestly don't know how long we can keep up this pace.  And this is without a baby.  I definitely am not one of those people who thrive on being busy all the time, going from one thing to the next without vacant hours in between.  How we find ourselves here I don't know, but even more depressing is that I don't see a way out.  Must.  De-clutter.  Life. 




Last night we hosted a happy hour for Hubs' carpool group - it was very fun!  And, if I do say so myself, I made a killer fondue.  Yummmmmm.
Thank goodness it's Friday.  Busy week, busy weekend, but tonight a little respit before we hit the ground running tomorrow.
So I think I'm finally going to have to succumb next week and break into the maternity pants.  They're ready and waiting in my closet, and this morning when I put my regular jeans on I had to lie on the bed on my back to pull on my socks.  I couldn't bend down around my belly in my barely-buttoning denim.  Uncle.  I give.


A little peevishness to start out the morning

Okay, here is my biggest pet peeve EVER:
(Hopefully I haven't started out another post with that same opening - if I have, disregard because this time I'm serious.)
An ambulance is coming from behind, so like a dutiful citizen you pull over to let it pass.  It does, and then the *sshole who's pulled over behind you cuts in front of you to get back on the road just as you're trying (like everyone is trying) to get back on the road.  You stupid turd, wait your turn!  We ALL had to pull over, and now we're ALL getting back on the road.  Don't try to get ahead in a situation where people are carrying on with their lives after taking a moment to pause and do the right thing.  WAIT!  Life has turns, and you should wait yours whenever possible.


In the moment

I think the hardest part about having a baby is that not everything can be figured out at once. There's a lot of undecides and wait-and-sees. For example, my maternity leave. Not sure how much time I'm going to take yet. And HR won't meet with me to go over everything and get the process started for another month.

One thing we do know now is that Hubs will take his paternity leave in a 4 week chunk immediately after the baby is born, so we'll be home together as a family for 4 weeks - YAY! I know we'll be sleep deprived and adjusting to having a baby in the house, etc. but it sounds like bliss to me - 4 whole weeks together!!!

Another unknown is the daycare situation. Centers are perfectly willing to sign you up today, but in-home providers are unsure of what their openings will be come late summer/early fall. They tell me it's early to start looking. EARLY?!?! As a planner, I feel months behind on everything!

I'm itching to get the nursery done I think because of all these other unknowns. I want a place that's baby-ready, since I'm not feeling baby-ready right now, I just need to stay in the moment, and know it will all get figured out. Eventually.



I had a wonderful weekend with my husband which reminded me that when we get time together, we're such a great couple! How can we get more time together?!?!?!

We need to reinstate date nights. Quick, before the McNugget makes her appearance.

On a scary note, Sunday morning we took Hero to the dog park and he got attacked by a pit bull! A pit bull! In a pink sweater of all things! (The pit bull, not Hero.) It was terrifying. It's amazing to me that no damage was done, because she was latched onto Hero's face for a good couple of seconds. There was some blood, but no discernible wound. Poor Hero was legitimately freaked out! It was nuts.

Some dogs should not go to the dog park. I won't get into my thoughts on pit bulls because it's complicated, but I will share my thoughts on pit bull owners who are apparently clueless: keep your untrained dog who just happens to have the capacity to be a killing machine at home. I realize we have a little terror of a dog, but the operative word there is little. And lacking the jaw power of a Great White. Neither of which can be said about this she-demon of a pit bull. My bottom line is, the more devastating the damage your dog can do, the more absolutely positive you'd better be that she isn't going to do it before you let her loose in public.

And for the love of all that's decent in this world, don't put her in a pink sweater!


Forward motion, if not exactly progress

My mom left on Sunday. I was so sad to see her go - it was really so nice having her here. But we had such a great visit that I didn't really feel upset by her leaving. Especially knowing she'll come back once the baby's born, so it won't be too long till I see her next. More than anything I feel blessed to have such a wonderful mom.

On Sunday after we dropped her off at the airport we ran a few errands and then went out for lunch. Back home we did some housework and then watched a few episodes of 24 on dvd from Netflix. It was a good day with Hubs, and that eased the transition to finding myself once again a geographical orphan :)

On the baby front, M3 (Miss Mini Mac) is squirming around like crazy and I love feeling her move! We'll finish part of the nursery this weekend and are resuming the hunt for daycare. In mid-March we visit the hospital where we'll deliver. I found a therapist who deals with pregnancy and postpartum issues (never can be too prepared) and I'm working with her to develop birthing and post-birth, back-at-home plans to keep me sane and healthy. I heart her. We're signing up for child birth classes, even though I don't feel like they'll be particularly helpful. But it's one of those things you do, right?

As for work, I still have no idea how much maternity leave I'll take or what kind of hours I'll go back to and how soon. Big question mark, but knowing I have flexibility there is nice (although in some ways even more daunting). I'm desperate to work at home, but so is most of the office so I have no idea whether or not that'll pan out.

Hero, more than anyone, is having trouble adjusting to my mom leaving. We've had many walks and visits to the dog park to try to compensate for his missing friend, but he's mostly inconsolable.


Just for kicks

This little girl's moving all over the place! I can feel her a lot now, and even Hubs and my mom can feel her through my stomach. Wild.

The nursery is painted!!!!!! Not decorated in any way, but painted!!!!!! It's not pink, and I feel slightly guilty about that. Not because it's not pink per se, but because it's not pastel. It's dark tan/light brown. Our nursery theme is 'jungle', and pink just doesn't belong in the jungle.