Labeled

The label ought to read: "SERIOUSLY, DO NOT REMOVE THIS TAG YOU MORON!"

Because a simple stated "Please do not remove" sounds a little too much like a suggestion. They may as well write "Maybe if you feel like it and it's not too much trouble how about you don't take this tag off, mmmmkay?"

I'm talking about the interlibrary loan tag that came affixed to my library book. It was large and hot pink and awkwardly stapled into place, so of course I removed it. I have OCD. I needed to remove it, it was practically beyond my control.

Well, turns out that when they say "Please do not remove" they, um... well, they really mean that. Like, a lot.

Whoopsie.

So I returned my interlibrary loan book without the tag and now it's gone forever. No, really. It's lost. I've lost - permanently - a library book.

If you know me at all, you'll know this hurts my very heart. I love love love the public library. One of the first thing I did when we moved to Champlin from Boston was to locate and sign up with the public library. I think libraries are amazing places: you walk in, and they give you FREE BOOKS. If you love books as much as I do, you can't help but be truly appreciative. It's like Christmas any day of the week.

But still, that florescent pink tag bothered me.

So I ripped it off.

And now that book is gone. No one else can ever read it! (Small dramatization.) It's been put into a book sale because it sat in the lost and found for so long. Turns out, all library systems have different bar codes that don't cross-communicate. So that tag they place on the interlibrary loan book is the only method the library has for keeping track of it and returning it to its rightful home. When they can't do that, they toss it into the lost and found and eventually, into the book sale racks.

Now, the fact that so many systems are in place in order for me to have gotten my sticky little hands on that book in the first place makes me cringe when I think of how disrespectfully I then treated it. I think it's fabulous that you can walk into your library and get books, but it's absolutely fantastic that you can go online from your library and gain access to any other county's books too.

I offered to pay for the lost book, but librarians are so freakin' nice that of course the woman I spoke with assured me it was fine, not to worry. She did mention, with her hand gently placed on mine, that the tag specifically mentions not removing it. Despite her kindness I slunk out the doors and frowned all the way home.

So this is another cautionary tale brought to you by Elle Charlie. Those mattresses tags? The tags on your furniture and pillows? The ones that say "Do not remove under penalty of law"? Maybe don't remove them. I'm extrapolating out from my experience, but I will from now on not remove ANY tag that suggests otherwise. I think you should do the same thing. Out of respect. For the library. Do it for the public library, that beacon against illiteracy and inequity. All together now, say it with me. "For the libary!!!"

(Also, don't doggie ear your pages. It's just rude. Not that I do that... But if I did I would now stop, on account of my recent eye-opening experience. Just use a bookmark - it's better for everyone.)